Here We Go Again + Some

Thoughts on my career:

This past week has been so extremely busy. Another school year beginning, a new curriculum to learn, a new class to manage, and 29 new students to guide. The responsibility if my chosen profession weighs down heavily upon me. I have an unspoken obligation to those placed in my keeping to always do what is right while keeping their best interest in mind. This is an obligation that I do not and cannot take lightly. As a consequence I have spent countless hours pouring over best practice and up to date research so that I might morally perform my job to the best of my abilities. I often question if the sacrifice I force upon my family as a result of my career truly balances out in the scheme of "right" and "wrong." Am I taking care of one responsibility while neglecting my first and foremost obligation? This is a question most working mothers ask at one point or another. Such is the constant battle of balance in my life. Regardless, I cannot live my life in fear of failure. I can only be true to myself during each moment of each day. I have high hopes for this year. I wish myself luck on the journey that lies before me.

Thoughts on 1st grade and the tooth-fairy:

How is it possible for my eldest women to have entered into 1st grade this past week? How did she evolve from such a tiny baby into a beautiful little girl? Time keeps marching forward regardless of those it effects. My worries and concerns regarding her first week of school were for not. She beamed from ear to ear throughout the week. Her smile was pure excitement while being walked into the school building every morning and while sharing her new "big girl school day" experiences every evening. She..."loves her bento box" and feels "so special" having a home lunch every day! Recess "is fun, but the sun is so hot and there is no shade" and "would you believe there isn't a drinking fountain anywhere outside?" My "mommy comfort" and sense of peace comes from the air kisses that are blown to me through a 1st grade classroom window every day, at 11:25 on the dot, as I "sneakily" spy on my eldest daughter in her new learning environment. How lucky I am to spend my days in school with my daughter. How blessed I feel to sense her sweet spirit near me throughout the day. She gives me strength; I am proud to be her mother.

On a side note: Did I mention that my eldest lost her 3rd tooth the night before her first day of school? It was one of those big teeth, on top in the front. She will soon loose it's identical twin and will, with a little luck, maintain a "gappy" grin until December when she can appropriately lisp that "all she wants for Christmas is her two front teeth." What can I say, the proof is in the pudding, my tiny girl is becoming a true-blue "Little Woman."

Thoughts on pre-school:

Yikes, my eldest isn't the only one growing older, somehow the baby of our family is beginning her own schooling career. I am admittedly excited for her. And yes, I can honestly say that. Preschool is a special phase of life for our family. It is an opportunity for our girls to explore life outside of our home in an extremely sheltered and well monitored environment. I am happy to let my littlest women explore the world outside of our home while controlling the method in which she does so. I have strong positive feelings about the school that she will attend, and it doesn't hurt that her older sister began her educational career at the same school in the same classroom and with the same teacher. We have been talking about how wonderful pre-school is all summer, and our littlest women is excited to be a "bigger girl" at last! She knows that she will be given a snack, and will be read stories, she looks forward to painting, and potty breaks where she will get to use the potty "all by herself." Although she is a bit timid and a bit shy, she is excited and cannot wait to meet Mrs. B this coming Tuesday. I can reserve my sadness at her "bigger girl" status by sharing in her joy and excitement at joining the rest of the world by beginning "school." Oh how I love my women. I often find myself dreaming about my littlest one as I complete my "tasks" throughout the workday, but will find comfort knowing that when she is not with her "papa," adopted "aunt," or pretend "brother" she is learning about life in a loving and secure environment. What can I say? She is ready for this new adventure and as much as I would like to hold on to her infancy, I owe her the opportunity to learn and grow and become the independent little thing that she desperately wants to be.

"I do love you, E.... Lu, and know that this first year of pre-school will be a wonderful experience. I cannot wait to attend your little parent teacher conferences and I look forward to my 1st homemade Mothers Day gift from you. Yes, you, my precious little woman!

Here we go again, but at least my "Sexy Man" seems to be stable in his life adventures for the moment! The last thing we need in our household is 3 crazy women AND a crazy man too:)